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That’s Me In The Corner…

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That’s me hiding from the spotlight.  Hiding from notice.

I don’t think I’ve really written in a year, and barely edited my WIP in all that time. I still think of myself as a writer, but maybe a better descriptor would be storyteller.

But in the last six years of learning to write with the intention of publishing, I have discovered HOW MANY other writers are trying to do the same thing. So many people are trying to use their art as their side hustle, or even trying to survive off it.  It’s shocking.  And I, now, have the privilege of a guaranteed home and food, for me and my child, so I’ve started going to Patreon to support artists and writers who don’t have that.

So, I may never publish.  I don’t think there is anything to say, that hasn’t been covered by those more deserving of a voice.

And that’s ok. I’ll still write, just for me, to tell myself stories.  In ten years, that could change, but the future is a distant place, and each day is only one step closer.

BUT, WAIT!  There’s more!

Somewhere in the last two years I remembered how important comic books were in my childhood. Then graphic novels.  Art in general.  My first paying gig was pictures of unicorns for my fourth grade classmates for 25 cents a pop.  I made $1.50. That was probably my last paying gig, back in 78 (?).

ANYWAY, art was something I put away when I turned 18, just like writing.  Without the resources to do art for a living, I had to work.  Retail. (URG) And then life moved on, as it does.

I don’t regret the life I had, but I do regret the thought that art was for other people.  If only I had kept practicing, all those years…

But I’m moving forward.  I’m changing and growing.  In the past year I’ve made a point to do art nearly every day.  I feel good about it, and even though it still looks amateur to my eyes, I see flashes of something deeper.  Something real.  I just need to master the mediums (and that takes decades) and something deeper will be uncovered.  It’s a little exciting.

My third Inktober sparked a lot of rough ideas, even if I’m still short five pieces. I’ll get those done, and then start the refining process. I was surprised when I realized art ALSO has rough drafts that are crap, but you keep doing it, and it gets better as you learn.  Exciting!

I may try to share all of this process, here, since I still love words so much, and spare the long winded musings from the friends on the other social platforms.  Oh, I have an instgram account, now, for the art I’m willing to share. I may never try to sell it.  https://www.instagram.com/danaewulfe/

So, I’m changing the focus of this blog, and maybe the layout, too.  I’m not in a hurry.  I’ve never been fast, or first, but I’m stubborn.  And, persistent.  Goat-headed, even.

And, maybe I’ll never publish, or sell more art, but it’s about self-expression, now.

And that’s ok.

 

Facing Your Fears

It’s time to fundraise for my daughter’s trip, again.  I HATE asking for money!

My daughter wants to sell art for a living. We’ve explained to her that artists often have to work day jobs to pay the bills. Her Occupational Credential Program at school has worked hard to make sure she has marketable skills, but they can’t really teach her to be an independent artist.

I want to write novels and make comic books.  I’ve been reading comic books all my life. I think in pictures.  (My stories have to be translated into words.) Some of my favorite authors also have graphic novels. I did Inktober last year, and I want more art in my life, but giving myself permission to draw has been a constant battle.

What if I hadn’t given up on writing and art once I left high school? What if I encourage my budding artist to get busy creating?  What if I made sure she got her feet wet before she has to work the daily grind? What if? What if?  WHAT IF?

I have decided to pool our abilities and resources, and put together a comic book as a fundraiser.  Independent publishing is bigger than it’s ever been, and lots of other artists have paved the way and have ALSO passed along the information you need to get started.

I have no idea what I’m doing, and it may completely blow up in my face, but I’m excited, and it also terrifies me, but I’m a-gonna DO IT!

This mother/daughter collaboration will either work, and be the first step on both of our art careers, OR…

I’m NOT giving up on my novel revisions (and there are some personal things that are sucking a lot of my energy away) and I’ll find a way to keep going there, too.  The next few months are going to be a rough ride.  But LIFE has presented a time-sensitive teaching moment, and I have to grab it by the bridle.

But I’m going to nudge that horse in the dang ribs, cinch up the belly strap, jump on, and hold on for dear life.

YEE-HAW!

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Hey, at least I’m drawing, again.